Lord Voldemort and the Christmas Carols
by RonWeasleyLove
Summary: The Dark Lord has taken over the wizarding world and needs entertainment. Can his Death Eaters fufill all of his Caroling needs or will they get killed and replaced by people in the Mistry. funny oneshot.


Lord Voldemort sighed as he sat on his throne. He had finally killed Harry Potter once Dumbledore was out of the way, killed off the entire Order of the Phoenix, and now had total control of the wizarding world. Yay Voldemort! **(A/n: coughs not)** Voldemort began tapping the arm of his chair. He looked to his left where he had the Ministry of Magic locked up and sighed.

"Oh Death Eaters," he chanted. Almost the second the last syllable of Voldemort's sentence left his lips; four Death Eaters ran to Voldemort and stood in front of him. "Hello Peter, Bella, Cissy, and Severus."

"What task to you put before us Dark Lord?" asked Bellatrix bowing deeply.

"I need….entertainment." said Voldemort.

"What would you like us to do?" asked Bella's sister Narcissa.

"Sing to me," he demanded, "Something about the upcoming holidays."

"Would you like us to sing you Christmas Carols?" Peter said questionably.

"Why yes that is exactly what I would like Wormtail. And I want it in the correct attire as well." He added. With a flick of Voldemort's wand the Death Eaters were dressed in red and green, Santa suits, bells, and Elf ears. He waved his wand again, this time he was using it as a baton and the four people before him were the choir.

"_Jingle Bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way, oh what fun it is to ride on a one horse open sleigh_," sang the death eaters in unison. Oddly their vocals were wonderful and the four of them singing sounded like a whole grand choir of one hundred. Probably a spell **(A/n: and thank goodness could you imagine Peter and Snape singing? Shudders)**.

"Don't like it, next" he said,

"_You better watch out, you better not shout, you better not cry I'm telling you why, Santa Clause is coming to town,_"

"Nope"

"_Rudolf the red-nosed reindeer, had a very shiny nose,_"

"Notta. Try something without Santa"

"Deck the Halls?" Narcissa suggested.

"Is that the one that goes Fra la la la la?" Voldermort asked.

"Yes," she said.

"Then no, Fra la la la la's do not tickle my pickle. You know what, sing me Chanukah songs," he commanded.

"_Dreydel dreydel dreydel I made it out of clay,_" they sang.

"No, no, no, no, _no_! Could that song be any more irritating?"

"If you find it irritating I find it twice more irritating than you," said Severus.

"Kwanza," the Dark Lord said, "Sing me Kwanza songs."

"Err…Dark Lord Sir," said Bellatrix timidly.

"Yes Bella?"

"There are no Kwanza Songs." She said.

"WHAT," he roared.

"There are none," said Narcissa backing her sister up.

"I have a whole dungeon full of people who would sing Kwanza songs for me in a minute and you won't even try? I can kill you with this wand, even without a spell. It might take a bit longer, but it's doable." Voldemort warned. None of the Death Eaters spoke, but simply stood their ground, waiting for the worst. "Once I say the spell you're all dead." Still no response. "Ava-" he began the curse waiting for the Death Eater's response, "da…Ked-" The four of them stood bravely while they watched Volemort carry out the spell as long as he could, "aaaaa-" Narcissa flinched as the spell neared its end, "vvvvv-" Bella flinched with her. "rrrrr" Peter hid behind Snape, "Once I say 'uh' (he imitated the sound that the 'a' made) you guys are dead you know that right?"

"Yes we know, what we don't know is why you won't kill us already," said Cissy.

"Well I don't wanna, I just want my songs" he said pouting. Thinking on her feat Bella broke out in song,

"_We wish you a Merry Kwanza, we wish you a Merry Kwanza, we wish you a Merry Kwanza, and a Happy December,_" At this Voldemort beamed and applauded her.

"Aaaaaaa, that ruled!" he said in joy looking up to see the four dead Death Eaters, killed from his wand, when he accidentally said the last part of the killing curse.


End file.
